Dear Chris Breezy...

After watching your 759th not-so-revealing and repetitive interview on 20/20 regarding the Rihanna Beatdown of 2009 incident, here's a couple of suggestions:
1. Fire your current stylist. Please. The sweaters...stop.
2. Hire a speech pathologist. There's no reason for your speech to be the same in 2009 as it was in 2005. There should have been SOME improvement.
3. If you're not going to give any of the details about the incident - you know, like when the bitch you beat up threw you under the bus a few weeks ago - then STOP DOING FRICKIN' INTERVIEWS ABOUT IT!!! We don't want to hear you repeat the same shit you said in the first 758 interviews!
4. Can you hook me up with your team? They are certainly working wonders for your career.
5. You don't need Rihanna. Slide over this way...*oops, did I say that?*

"Graffiti" drops this Tuesday, December 8th. Pick up Rihanna's "Rated R" while you're at it.